Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
