Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Randomize
