She is in my trunk
"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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