Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Randomize