It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
I had to cum in my sink.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
