just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize
