walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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