just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
