what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Randomize
