I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Randomize
