I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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