this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize
