You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
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