do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
Randomize
