I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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