My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Randomize
