see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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