I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
