you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize