Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
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