lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
Still dying that you shit outside
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
