Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize