i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize