Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
He better not be in your backpack
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize
