well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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