And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I just googled if crying burns calories
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Randomize
