careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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