Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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