I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Liz is crying about burritos again.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
