so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
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