ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Randomize
