Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
