what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
it was like eating out sand paper
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Randomize
