Pappa wants mamma naked
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
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