after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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