return my video game
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Randomize
