i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
