I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
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