how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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