Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
I want to be your penis for a week.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
Randomize
