Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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