It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
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