then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
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