i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
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I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
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He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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