And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize