Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
