just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize