fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
i need some magic done to my vagina
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
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