yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Well I just put wine in my tea
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
