Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
home. puking in laundry basket.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
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He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
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Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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