The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
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